All things considered, this is an album I thought I'd never review. But after I couldn't pin down Skid Row's "I Remember You" while perusing in my friend's food-littered Ford Focus, I felt extremely disappointed (because seriously, it was #1 for how many weeks?). One re-read of Chuck Klosterman's Fargo Rock City and ten Slaughter tracks later, I consider myself somewhat redeemable if I review one of the best glam metal albums ever made. Or maybe I've just lost my already wavering credibility with all three readers of this blog because I admitted that I have more than one Slaughter song in my iTunes library. Sorry.
1984 was Van Halen at their zenith, critically and commercially. While Eddie Van Halen had already mastered his signature pyrotechnic riffs on previous albums (spare a dark conceptual rut with Fair Warning), this album cemented their status as Billboard favorites and redefined the glam rock genre. At the same time, it furthermore mounted tensions between Eddie and vocalist David Lee Roth, and a year after the album's release, Diamond Dave took his drunken douchebaggery and habitual girl chasing elsewhere, exiting the group and leaving 1984 behind as his last and very triumphant hurrah. Sammy Hagar stepped in as lead performer in the years that followed, but most Van Halen fans (including myself) act like this never happened, because, really, we can't respect the guy who wrote the song, "I Can't Drive 55."
"1984," the album's opener, is a short and hokey synth instrumental written and performed by Eddie. For a title track, it's fairly mediocre in nature, but it also serves as a relatively decent preview for what's to follow. The succeeding track, "Jump," oozes 1980s pop anthem, driven by its artificial brass intro and thoroughly coinciding with what was later coined "arena rock." After over three million sales, three decades, and one bastardized cover (see: Glee), it still serves as Van Halen's signature staple. "Panama," "Hot for Teacher," and "I'll Wait," are rife with choice guitar licks and fetching choruses, also going on and meeting "Jump" in becoming overplayed MTV monster hits. "Girl Gone Bad" and "Top Jimmy" carry a faint avant-garde feel underneath the abundance of arpeggios, while "Drop Dead Legs" is the perfect representation of drummer Alex Van Halen's ability to carry a steadily powerful sound. The underrated "House of Pain" ends 1984 on a high note (literally) with Eddie's final solo shrieking its way through a reluctant yet very fitting conclusion to a stellar album.
While 1984 isn't the greatest album of all time as some people claim, it's particularly monumental to Van Halen's back catalog. It champions over one or two of its predecessors, and triumphs over any of Hagar's efforts. It also successfully exemplifies two distinct elements within the band: Eddie's guitar talent and Roth's egotistical personality. Without these things, Van Halen, in all its corny-yet-awesome long haired grandeur, might have never been, 'cause lord knows you need some guitars and a total asshole to catapult a hair metal band into Rolling Stone fame.
Please don't expect a slew of hair metal reviews after this, because I wouldn't review anything by Vixen even if you paid me for it. But I'm sure Appetite for Destruction will show up somewhere in the near future.
Extremely low-budget:
Extremely bastardized:
Somewhat clever:
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